July 2010
(via blogconfession)
Do not tell her that there are plenty of fish in the sea.
She’ll be a smartass, she’ll say, “BUT I DON’T WANT A FISH. I WANT HIM. I WANT HIM BACK. WAHHHHHH.” Then you’re a socially awkward penguin.
- Do not tell her that he was stupid for leaving her.
She’ll be a smartass, she’ll say, “I WAS STUPID FOR LOVING HIM. WAHHHH.” Then you’re again, socially awkward penguin.
- Do not tell her that he didn’t deserve her, and that she was too good.
She’ll be a smartass, she’ll say, “IF I’M SO GOOD, WHY DID HE BREAK UP WITH ME. WAAAAAAH.” Then you’re socially awkward penguin.
What you do is, you say, “BITCH. GET THE FUCK UP. WE’RE GOING TO WAL-MART. WE ARE BUYING A GALLON OF ICE CREAM FOR YOUR MOPEY ASS, AND YOU’RE GOING TO CRY. ALL FUCKING NIGHT. YOU WILL WAKE UP TOMORROW MORNING. WE ARE BURNING ALL HIS SHIT. ALL OF IT. WE’LL GO SHOPPING, AND BE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BITCHES ON THE PLANET.”She can’t be a smartass, and you are no longer caught in a socially awkward situation. You are not a penguin, you are practically jesus.
(via -alejandra)
cuntented: adjectival: kenzieshae:
You could search like, “where the fuck is my cell phone?” and it would be like, “it’s under the couch, dumbass.”
hahaha so cute <3 sigh. he did something for me again. even when he was injured, he still insisted on it. <3
Dear _______,
“I like you” are 3 words i can never tell you, because i feel that i’m not good enough for you. Call it inferiority complex if you will, but i have never been able to confess to a guy(unless jokingly-i did it to Matt the other day) before. It’s my fear of rejection. i think you’re tall, fit, and reasonably not-bad looking and i feel that i basically fall short.
Do you know that when you asked me out on the study date, i was so happy and i kept smiling the whole time before i went to bed. I dreamt of you for the next 3 consecutive nights (they were random, you just popped up). even for the next 2 days, barely anything could spoil my mood. i was THAT happy.
We have been messaging everyday and you have this bad habit of taking a long time to reply at times. I’d feel weird and anxious waiting for your reply. Not messaging you for a short while because we’re both busy feels weird, it feels like there’s something missing. I love how you treat many things optimistically and you’re just so darn nice, always cheering me up and encouraging me to think positively.
I always walk past your class, hoping to get a glimpse of you and i always look out for you on the assembly grounds. That’s how much i want to see you because that is HOW little i see you in school. I really wish i could see you every single day. ):
Regarding tomorrow’s study date, I’ve been feeling anxious for the entire week now, afraid that once i meet you, you’ll notice all my flaws and i wouldn’t stand a chance already. My friends tell me to be careful, since you’re older but i think you’re just so nice, you wouldn’t even hurt a fly. I was jumping for joy when you asked me to watch Despicable Me with you because i went crazy over it yesterday and was complaining how i wanted to watch it but didn’t have the time. I love how you’re so straightforward.
Dear _______, here’s my letter to you (:
xoxo,
Jasmine.
